The Night Watchman, Or How Government Gets So Bloated

Tonight, I bring to you a funny little fable, with more than a grain of truth to it. I didn't write it, but I did modify it to bring it up to date, and I found it to be eerily accurate in its depiction of how the government functions. Enjoy.

* * *

NIGHT WATCHMAN

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert.

Congress said, "Someone may steal from it at night."
So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job.

Then Congress said, "How does the watchman do his job without instruction?"
So they created ...a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies.

Then Congress said, "How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?"
So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people. One was to do the studies and one was to write the reports.

Then Congress said, "How are these people going to get paid?"
So they created two positions: a time keeper and a payroll officer then hired two people.

Then Congress said, "Who will be accountable for all of these people?"
So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal Secretary.

Then Congress said, "We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $918,000 over budget, we must cut back."

So they laid-off the night watchman.

* * *

Let that slowly sink in.

Quietly, we go like sheep to slaughter. Does anybody remember the reason given for the establishment of the DEPARTMENT OF ENERGY during the Carter administration?

It was very simple... and at the time, everybody thought it very appropriate.

The Department of Energy was instituted on 8/04/1977, to lessen our dependence on foreign oil.

Yeah... How's that working out for us?

Now it's 2014. Thirty-seven years later, and the budget for this “necessary” department is roughly $25 billion. With somewhere in the neighborhood of 17,000 federal employees, and nearly 100,000 contract employees, I'd say they've grossly underachieved in their mandate. And that's putting it mildly.

When the Department of Energy was first created, approximately 30% of our oil consumption was from foreign sources. Today, foreign imports of oil account for almost 40%. Sounds like a fail to me.

Ah, yes -- good old Federal bureaucracy.

And we just had one-sixth of our economy handed over to the same people who can't figure out how to send the mail from one destination to another quickly and efficiently?

To quote a familiar cartoon character - “D'oh!!!” ~ Hunter


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